Building Healthy Relationships Through Godly Wisdom
Summary
### Summary
Today, we delved into the profound wisdom found in the book of Proverbs, focusing on how it guides us in managing our relationships. We began by exploring the foundational relationship with God and ourselves, emphasizing the importance of fearing the Lord. This fear is not about being scared but having a deep respect and reverence for God, which is the beginning of wisdom. Proverbs 9:10 in the Passion Translation beautifully captures this: "The starting point for acquiring wisdom is to be consumed with awe as you worship Yahweh."
We discussed two essential practices that demonstrate our love and respect for God: reading the Word and prayer. The Word of God is our weapon, protection, and transformer. It reveals God's nature and character, helping us understand who we are in Him. Prayer, on the other hand, is our spirit making live contact with God's spirit, allowing His life and goodness to penetrate our core.
We also touched on the importance of dealing with our inner wounds and traumas. Unresolved issues can lead to unhealthy relationships and cycles of hurt. We must confront these issues with honesty and allow God to heal us. This healing enables us to maintain and manage our relationships effectively, guided by the Holy Spirit.
Furthermore, we explored the significance of surrounding ourselves with wise and godly people. Proverbs 13:20 and 27:17 remind us that walking with the wise makes us wise, and iron sharpens iron. We need humility to learn from others and be sharpened by them.
Lastly, we addressed the issue of church hurt and offense. Proverbs 18:19 highlights how a wronged brother is more unyielding than a fortified city. We must confront disputes with love and the leading of the Holy Spirit to prevent division and foster unity within the church.
As we concluded, we were reminded of the importance of being obedient to God, allowing Him to lead us in our relationships. We took communion, reflecting on the sacrifice of Jesus and committing to live in a way that honors Him.
### Key Takeaways
1. Fear of the Lord as the Foundation of Wisdom: True wisdom begins with a deep respect and reverence for God. This fear is not about being scared but about acknowledging His holiness and sovereignty. It is the starting point for acquiring wisdom and understanding His ways. [10:38]
2. The Transformative Power of the Word and Prayer: Reading the Word of God and engaging in prayer are essential practices for spiritual growth. The Word reveals God's nature and transforms our inner being, while prayer connects our spirit with God's, allowing His life to flow into us. [12:54]
3. Healing Inner Wounds for Healthy Relationships: Unresolved traumas and past hurts can hinder our relationships. We must confront these issues honestly and allow God to heal us. This healing enables us to maintain and manage our relationships effectively, guided by the Holy Spirit. [24:50]
4. Surrounding Ourselves with Wise and Godly People: Proverbs teaches us the importance of walking with the wise and allowing ourselves to be sharpened by others. We need humility to learn from those who have godly wisdom and to be open to their influence in our lives. [36:16]
5. Confronting Church Hurt and Offense with Love: Church hurt and offense can create strong barriers. We must confront these issues with love and the leading of the Holy Spirit to prevent division and foster unity within the church. True love confronts and seeks reconciliation. [43:37]
### YouTube Chapters
[0:00] - Welcome
[03:59] - Introduction and Series Overview
[04:56] - The Need for Wisdom in Relationships
[07:25] - Proverbs 9:7-12 Reading
[09:31] - Prayer and Acknowledgment of God's Presence
[10:38] - Understanding the Fear of the Lord
[12:54] - The Importance of Reading the Word
[14:38] - Developing a Passionate Prayer Life
[18:47] - Testimonies of Prayer and Fasting
[23:00] - Spiritual Formation for Relationships
[24:50] - Dealing with Inner Wounds and Traumas
[30:15] - The Battle in the Spiritual Realm
[36:16] - Surrounding Ourselves with Wise People
[43:37] - Confronting Church Hurt and Offense
[52:05] - Obedience and Relationship Management
[53:40] - Communion and Reflection
Study Guide
### Bible Study Discussion Guide
#### Bible Reading
1. Proverbs 9:10 (Passion Translation): "The starting point for acquiring wisdom is to be consumed with awe as you worship Yahweh."
2. Proverbs 13:20: "Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm."
3. Proverbs 18:19: "A brother wronged is more unyielding than a fortified city; disputes are like the barred gates of a citadel."
#### Observation Questions
1. What does Proverbs 9:10 say is the starting point for acquiring wisdom?
2. According to Proverbs 13:20, what is the outcome of walking with wise people?
3. How does Proverbs 18:19 describe the difficulty of reconciling with a wronged brother? [43:37]
4. What are the two essential practices mentioned in the sermon that demonstrate our love and respect for God? [12:54]
#### Interpretation Questions
1. How does the fear of the Lord differ from being scared of God, according to the sermon? [10:38]
2. Why is it important to deal with inner wounds and traumas for maintaining healthy relationships? [24:50]
3. What role does humility play in surrounding ourselves with wise and godly people, as discussed in the sermon? [36:16]
4. How can confronting church hurt and offense with love prevent division and foster unity within the church? [43:37]
#### Application Questions
1. Reflect on your own relationship with God. How can you cultivate a deeper respect and reverence for Him in your daily life? [10:38]
2. What specific steps can you take to make reading the Word and engaging in prayer a more consistent part of your routine? [12:54]
3. Are there any unresolved traumas or past hurts in your life that might be affecting your current relationships? What steps can you take to address these issues? [24:50]
4. Think about the people you surround yourself with. Are they wise and godly influences? If not, how can you seek out and build relationships with such individuals? [36:16]
5. Have you ever experienced church hurt or offense? How did you handle it, and what could you do differently in the future to foster reconciliation and unity? [43:37]
6. Identify a relationship in your life that needs healing. What practical steps can you take to confront the issues with love and the guidance of the Holy Spirit? [45:39]
7. How can you be more obedient to God in your relationships, allowing Him to lead and guide you? What specific changes can you make to honor Him in your interactions with others? [52:42]
Devotional
### 5-Day Devotional
Day 1: Reverence for God as the Foundation of Wisdom
Description:
True wisdom begins with a deep respect and reverence for God. This fear is not about being scared but about acknowledging His holiness and sovereignty. It is the starting point for acquiring wisdom and understanding His ways. Proverbs 9:10 in the Passion Translation beautifully captures this: "The starting point for acquiring wisdom is to be consumed with awe as you worship Yahweh." This reverence for God shapes our perspective and guides our decisions, leading us to live in alignment with His will.
When we fear the Lord, we recognize His authority and submit to His guidance. This submission is not out of compulsion but out of love and respect for who He is. It transforms our hearts and minds, enabling us to walk in wisdom and make choices that honor Him. [10:38]
Bible Passage:
"The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge; fools despise wisdom and instruction." — Proverbs 1:7 (ESV)
Reflection:
Think about an area in your life where you need to acknowledge God's authority more fully. How can you show reverence and respect for Him in that area today?
Day 2: The Transformative Power of the Word and Prayer
Description:
Reading the Word of God and engaging in prayer are essential practices for spiritual growth. The Word reveals God's nature and transforms our inner being, while prayer connects our spirit with God's, allowing His life to flow into us. The Bible is not just a book of rules but a living document that speaks to our hearts and minds, guiding us in truth and righteousness.
Prayer is our lifeline to God, a way to communicate with Him and receive His guidance and strength. It is through prayer that we align our will with His and invite His presence into our daily lives. These practices are not just rituals but vital components of a vibrant and growing relationship with God. [12:54]
Bible Passage:
"For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart." — Hebrews 4:12 (ESV)
Reflection:
How can you incorporate more time for reading the Word and prayer into your daily routine? What specific steps will you take to make these practices a priority?
Day 3: Healing Inner Wounds for Healthy Relationships
Description:
Unresolved traumas and past hurts can hinder our relationships. We must confront these issues honestly and allow God to heal us. This healing enables us to maintain and manage our relationships effectively, guided by the Holy Spirit. When we carry unhealed wounds, they can manifest in our interactions with others, leading to cycles of hurt and misunderstanding.
God desires to heal our inner wounds and set us free from the pain of the past. This process requires honesty, vulnerability, and a willingness to let God into the deepest parts of our hearts. As we allow Him to heal us, we become better equipped to love and relate to others in a healthy and godly manner. [24:50]
Bible Passage:
"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds." — Psalm 147:3 (ESV)
Reflection:
Identify a past hurt or trauma that you have not fully addressed. How can you invite God into that area for healing today? What steps can you take to begin the healing process?
Day 4: Surrounding Ourselves with Wise and Godly People
Description:
Proverbs teaches us the importance of walking with the wise and allowing ourselves to be sharpened by others. We need humility to learn from those who have godly wisdom and to be open to their influence in our lives. Surrounding ourselves with wise and godly people helps us grow in our faith and make better decisions.
These relationships provide accountability, encouragement, and guidance. They challenge us to grow and become more like Christ. It is essential to seek out and cultivate relationships with those who can positively influence our spiritual journey. [36:16]
Bible Passage:
"Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." — Proverbs 13:20 (ESV)
Reflection:
Who are the wise and godly people in your life that you can learn from? How can you intentionally spend more time with them and seek their guidance?
Day 5: Confronting Church Hurt and Offense with Love
Description:
Church hurt and offense can create strong barriers. We must confront these issues with love and the leading of the Holy Spirit to prevent division and foster unity within the church. True love confronts and seeks reconciliation. When we experience hurt within the church, it can be challenging to address it in a healthy and godly manner.
However, God calls us to pursue peace and unity, even in the face of offense. This requires humility, forgiveness, and a willingness to have difficult conversations. By addressing church hurt with love and grace, we can prevent division and build a stronger, more unified body of Christ. [43:37]
Bible Passage:
"A brother offended is more unyielding than a strong city, and quarreling is like the bars of a castle." — Proverbs 18:19 (ESV)
Reflection:
Is there someone in your church community with whom you have unresolved conflict or hurt? How can you take a step towards reconciliation and healing in that relationship today?
Quotes
### Quotes for Outreach
1. "So what does it mean to fear God? What does the fear of the Lord mean? So people think when the Bible says fear, we get like this negative connotation. That there's this intimidation that is implied from this scripture. We relate to God. And we don't like to use the word fear. But what we do know is that there is a holy God that sits on the throne who sent his son down to die on the cross just so he can live on the inside of you. A holy God living and breathing on the inside." [10:38] (51 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
2. "There are two things that we can do to show that we love and honor and respect God. To show that we have a fear of God. And that's reading your word and praying. It is only through the reading of the word of God that we can get an insight of who God is. And what he has in store for our lives. We have the opportunity, when we read the word, we have the opportunity to allow the nature and the character of God be revealed to us and in us through the reading and meditating on his word." [12:54] (44 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
3. "We need to develop our prayer life. We need to have a passionate and a lively and healthy prayer life. Yes? Yes. So when we pray, we pray from a place from how God has revealed himself to us from reading the word. His living and breathing word ministering to the spirit of the living God that's on the inside of us. So when we pray, we pray from a place of God, our spirit, that applies as Jesus said." [14:38] (29 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
4. "We are to love the Lord your God with all of your, with all of your soul and with all of your, and with all of your, yeah, good job. Nice. The second is this. Love your neighbor as yourself. Come on, guys. There is no commandment greater than these. And the reason why I wanted to talk to you today about prayer and reading our word is because we need to have our spiritual formation ready for when we engage our relationships." [20:41] (39 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
5. "We need to die to ourselves. We need to bring it before the Lord and let him do an inner healing in us. You know, counseling and therapy is good, and we need those professionals to speak into our lives. But there is something that only prayer and the Holy Spirit can help you break free from. Only Holy Spirit can heal you. And that's why we need to do business with God. That's why we need to intercede with God and read our word and love God with everything that is in us." [33:49] (37 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
### Quotes for Members
1. "If we want wisdom in our relationship, we want to maintain and manage healthy friendships and healthy relationships. We need to deal with us first. Before we go to our friend and tell them about the plank in their eye, we need to deal with the plank in our eye. Yes! Wow! Thank you! We have to deal with our issues, friends. We have to surrender to God and say, yes, Lord, come and do the work in me. Lead me, Holy Spirit, into all understanding so I can know your ways and will." [25:26] (46 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
2. "When trauma is introduced into your life, into someone's life, there's a shift in the physical realm and in the unseen realm, the spiritual realm. That's what happened to me. So in the spiritual realm, a spirit of perversion was released into my life. And in the physical realm, it looked like confusion, the inability to make decisions. And that was only one of the things that was released into my life. And it was one of the things I had to be honest with." [27:26] (40 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
3. "We have to deal with those issues. The Lord said, I want you to deal with these situations because I don't want any secret resentments hidden underneath your issues with people at your church. We have to deal with it. We cannot allow the hurt and the pain to just sit in us and fester and stew in us. It literally tears away the very fabric of our soul. Have you ever had that feeling when something is not settled and you have something that God has put on your heart to say and you don't say it?" [47:33] (47 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
4. "We need to be careful when we are surrounded by fools. Sometimes in our brokenness we might find it difficult to be near someone who might challenge us in the spirit, right? We might seem a little bit intimidating. We may think that they're better than us. And they might be smarter or have more knowledge. It makes us feel insecure. But if we're going to do better and be better, we need humility to say, you know what, that person has something that I need that can change my life. And whatever I need to do, I'm going to sit under that person and I'm going to receive from them." [35:39] (49 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
5. "We need to plant ourselves and confront our brother and sister in love to build the character necessary to fortify our relationships in church. We want to fortify that thing. We want our relationships at church and at home to be so fortified that no evil thing can break through. So as we consider these things, let us be mindful that God is wanting to do a new thing. We have these relationships and God is wanting you to end that relationship, to start a new relationship. And we just need to be obedient to what it is that he wants us to do." [50:45] (52 seconds) (Download raw clip | Download cropped clip)
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