Biblical Womanhood and Marriage: A Divine Partnership
Summary
Today’s focus was on understanding the biblical vision for womanhood and marriage, especially in a world filled with conflicting cultural messages. Society often presents two extremes: the “girl boss” who seeks self-sufficiency and power, and the “trad wife” who finds her identity in serving her husband and home. Both of these models, while loud and influential, miss the deeper truth of what God intended for women and for marriage. Instead of being forced to choose between these extremes, we are invited to look at God’s original design in creation and the teachings of Scripture.
Genesis 2 reveals that woman was created as a “helper” for man, but this word—so often misunderstood—does not imply inferiority or subservience. In fact, the same Hebrew word for “helper” is used to describe God himself in relation to humanity. This means that being a helper is a position of strength, partnership, and essential support, not of lesser value. Both men and women are made in the image of God, and both are necessary for the fullness of humanity. The creation narrative points to a unity and interdependence, not a hierarchy of worth.
The New Testament continues this theme. Paul’s writings, often misused to justify rigid gender roles, actually call for mutual submission and respect within marriage. Ephesians 5, for example, begins with the command to “submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” The specific instructions to husbands and wives are not about domination or passivity, but about sacrificial love and respect. The marriage relationship is likened to a dance—one may lead, but both must move in harmony, each valuing and supporting the other.
This vision of marriage and womanhood is not about who is in charge, but about who is kneeling side by side, serving God together. It’s a partnership that reflects the unity and diversity within the very nature of God. While none of us live this out perfectly, the call is to continually submit ourselves to Christ, allowing his love and example to shape our relationships. True unity and partnership begin at the foot of the cross, where love and submission meet.
Key Takeaways
- The biblical term “helper” (ezer) used for women in Genesis is not a statement of inferiority, but of essential partnership and strength. The same word is used for God as our helper, showing that to help is to come alongside in power and necessity, not as a subordinate. This reframes our understanding of gender roles from hierarchy to mutuality. [01:05:02]
- Both men and women are created in the image of God, and the creation narrative points to their interdependence. The unity described—two becoming one—means that neither is complete without the other, and neither is more valuable. This challenges any worldview that elevates one gender above the other and calls us to honor the image of God in each person. [01:09:09]
- Paul’s instructions about marriage in the New Testament, especially in Ephesians 5, are often misunderstood. The call to mutual submission is foundational: both husband and wife are to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. The specific roles described are not about power, but about sacrificial love and respect, mirroring Christ’s relationship with the church. [01:17:23]
- The marriage relationship is best understood as a dance—one may lead, but both must move in harmony. If either partner dominates or disengages, the partnership breaks down. True biblical marriage is about cooperation, unity, and mutual submission, not about asserting authority or passively following. [01:22:24]
- None of us can live out this vision perfectly; we all fall short by putting ourselves first. The foundation for godly relationships is not a perfect model, but a Savior who laid down his life for us. True partnership and unity begin when we submit to Christ, allowing his love to transform us and our relationships from the inside out. [01:29:09]
Youtube Chapters
[00:00] - Welcome
[55:36] - Praying for Pincher Creek and Local Churches
[56:52] - Cultural Trends: Girl Boss vs. Trad Wife
[59:01] - Personal Reflections on Marriage
[01:00:22] - The Question: What is Biblical Womanhood?
[01:02:07] - Genesis 2: The Creation of Woman
[01:05:02] - The Meaning of “Helper” in Scripture
[01:08:50] - Created in God’s Image: Male and Female
[01:10:28] - New Testament: Interdependence of Men and Women
[01:11:30] - Understanding 1 Corinthians 11 and Cultural Context
[01:14:47] - Ephesians 5: Submission and Love in Marriage
[01:17:23] - Mutual Submission Explained
[01:21:00] - The Dance: Partnership in Marriage
[01:23:28] - When Reality Doesn’t Match the Ideal
[01:25:10] - Breaking the Crazy Cycle in Relationships
[01:26:41] - A Godly Marriage: Kneeling Side by Side
[01:29:09] - The Need for a Savior and True Unity
[01:30:18] - Invitation to Follow Christ
[01:32:43] - Closing Blessing and Dismissal
Study Guide
Small Group Bible Study Guide: Biblical Womanhood & Marriage
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### Bible Reading
- Genesis 2:18-25
- Ephesians 5:21-33
- 1 Corinthians 11:11-12
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### Observation Questions
1. In Genesis 2, what reason does God give for creating woman, and how is the word “helper” described in the sermon? [[01:05:02]]
2. According to Ephesians 5, what is the first command Paul gives to both husbands and wives before he talks about their specific roles? [[01:17:23]]
3. In 1 Corinthians 11, how does Paul describe the relationship between men and women? [[01:10:28]]
4. The sermon mentions two cultural extremes for women: “girl boss” and “trad wife.” What are the main characteristics of each, according to the sermon? [[56:52]]
---
### Interpretation Questions
1. The Hebrew word for “helper” (ezer) is also used for God in the Old Testament. What does this suggest about the value and role of women in God’s design? [[01:05:02]]
2. How does the idea of “mutual submission” in Ephesians 5 challenge both traditional and modern views of marriage roles? [[01:17:23]]
3. The sermon compares marriage to a dance, where one may lead but both must move in harmony. What does this metaphor reveal about how marriage should function? [[01:22:24]]
4. The creation narrative says both men and women are made in God’s image and are interdependent. How does this challenge the idea that one gender is more important than the other? [[01:09:09]]
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### Application Questions
1. The sermon says that being a “helper” is not about being less important, but about being an essential partner. In your own relationships (marriage, friendship, work), do you ever feel like your role is undervalued? How can you reframe your thinking to see your contribution as essential? [[01:05:02]]
2. Ephesians 5 calls for mutual submission out of reverence for Christ. What does mutual submission look like in your daily life? Are there areas where you find it hard to submit or to love sacrificially? [[01:17:23]]
3. The sermon challenges us not to get stuck in cultural extremes (“girl boss” or “trad wife”). Are there ways you’ve felt pressured to fit into one of these molds? How can you focus more on God’s design for partnership instead? [[56:52]]
4. The “dance” metaphor suggests that both partners need to move in harmony. Think of a recent conflict or disagreement in a close relationship. Did one person dominate or disengage? What could you do differently next time to move in harmony? [[01:22:24]]
5. The sermon says true unity and partnership begin at the foot of the cross, where love and submission meet. Is there a specific area in your relationships where you need to kneel “side by side” with someone and invite Jesus to transform your attitude or actions? [[01:29:09]]
6. The pastor mentioned the “crazy cycle” in relationships, where each person waits for the other to apologize or change first. Can you think of a time you were stuck in this cycle? What would it look like for you to “get off the cycle” and take the first step toward reconciliation? [[01:25:10]]
7. None of us live out this vision perfectly. The sermon says we all need a Savior, not just a better model. How can you remind yourself this week to rely on Jesus’ love and example, rather than just trying harder on your own? [[01:29:09]]
---
Devotional
Day 1: Created for Partnership, Not Hierarchy
From the very beginning, God designed men and women to be partners, not for one to be above the other. In Genesis 2, God saw that it was not good for man to be alone and created woman as a "helper," a term that, far from implying inferiority, is also used to describe God Himself as our helper. This partnership is a reflection of God's own image, where both male and female are created with equal value and purpose, meant to work together in unity and mutual support. [01:04:46]
Genesis 2:18, 21-24 (ESV)
Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” ... So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Reflection: In what ways can you intentionally treat your spouse or close relationships as true partners today, honoring their equal value and unique strengths?
Day 2: Mutual Dependence and the Image of God
Scripture teaches that men and women are interdependent, each coming from and needing the other, and both ultimately coming from God. This mutual dependence is not just biological but spiritual, as both are created in God's image and called to reflect His unity and diversity. When we recognize that neither is complete without the other, we can better appreciate the beauty of God's design for relationships and community. [01:10:40]
1 Corinthians 11:11-12 (ESV)
Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man nor man of woman; for as woman was made from man, so man is now born of woman. And all things are from God.
Reflection: How can you express gratitude today for the ways others—especially those different from you—reflect God’s image and contribute to your life?
Day 3: Submission and Love—A Dance of Mutual Sacrifice
Biblical submission in marriage is not about domination or inferiority, but about mutual sacrifice, love, and respect. Both husbands and wives are called to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ, with husbands loving sacrificially as Christ loved the church and wives respecting their husbands. This dynamic is like a dance, where both partners move in harmony, each sometimes leading, but always working together for the good of the relationship and the glory of God. [01:17:23]
Ephesians 5:21-28, 33 (ESV)
...submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself... However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Reflection: What is one practical way you can show sacrificial love or respect to your spouse or a close friend today, even if it requires humility or letting go of your own preferences?
Day 4: Godly Marriage Is Measured by Kneeling Side by Side
A godly marriage or partnership is not about who leads or who gets their way, but about who is willing to kneel side by side in submission to Christ. True unity and strength in relationships come when both partners seek God together, serve one another, and model Christ’s love to those around them. This kind of relationship becomes a powerful witness to the world, showing that love, respect, and mutual submission are possible through God’s grace. [01:27:10]
Philippians 2:1-4 (ESV)
So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.
Reflection: How can you and your spouse, family member, or friend take a moment today to pray together, seeking God’s will and unity in your relationship?
Day 5: True Unity Begins with Submission to Christ
No matter how hard we try, we all fall short in our relationships and need more than just a better model—we need a Savior. True unity, love, and partnership begin when we first submit our lives to Jesus, who loved us enough to lay down His life for us. As we surrender to Him, He transforms our hearts, enabling us to love and serve others as He does, and to reflect His grace in all our relationships. [01:29:09]
Romans 12:1-2 (ESV)
I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
Reflection: Is there an area of your life or relationship where you need to surrender control to Jesus today? What step can you take right now to invite Him to transform your heart and actions?
Quotes
I think that the best place to start when it comes to looking at these sorts of things is to begin with the created order. After all, I figure that if prein God uh created the world in a certain way and he tells us certain things prein, maybe that'll give us a good hint, a good place to start. [01:01:56]
I think it's amazing that as God is writing into a culture that was very strongly patriarchal that God takes the time to describe creating man and saying man can't do this alone. He takes the time and says creation's not quite how I want it to be like this. there's a hole in humanity. I think it's it's such a great lesson for us. [01:04:20]
Well, the issue is we have to determine what is a biblical helper. And traditionally, you know, again, coming out of the cultures that that we uh that we saw scripture and Christianity moving through, the idea was that this helper is someone who follows directions and does what's needed to help where needed. [01:05:46]
But I wonder as I looked at this, what does the Bible say about helper? And so I did this amazing thing. It's called looking elsewhere in the Bible for contextual clues as to how the Bible utilizes helper. And I did find that there were times um where you know someone needed help and it was like hey and so someone came along they got a aair they got a helper but here's what I also found Psalm uh 70 verse 5 but as for me I am poor and needy please hurry to my aid oh God you are my helper and my savior oh lord do not delay all right so God is a helper to to humanity well maybe that's an outlier [01:06:39]
So what do we mean when we say God is my helper? Do we mean that he's some lesser person that's just got to take our directions and he's going to do whatever we want? No. Good answer. Fantastic. Somebody's been raising that kid, right? He's mine. [01:08:23]
So I I think that when we look at the creation narrative, yes, it's very easy for us to go, well, woman was created second and and the helper and all of these kinds of things and and we maybe just go along with it here, but that's not actually what I see here. When I look at the created order of things, I kind of see that God created partners, that he created a unit. [01:09:32]
For although the first woman came from man, every other man was born from a woman and everything comes from God." I think this is beautiful. Like why did God wait to create woman and create her out of man? Man, I I think that it's beautiful that he actually tells us why here, right? Because there's an interdependence. [01:10:40]
Now, we do have to address the context of 1 Corinthians 11. uh 1 Corinthians 11 uh we see you know verses where Paul is saying things like women need to cover their heads because the the head is the glory of or her hair is the glory of the man or things like that and guys shouldn't cover their heads and and all this type of thing and and so it gets really confusing sometime we're like okay so so Paul is is basically trying to like set an order here is that what's happening he's creating like regulations that that men are above women's sort of thing or something like that. [01:11:30]
This passage is about unity. This passage is about making sure that there isn't a divide between people. It's about not breaking the witness of the church for things that have nothing to do with the Christian faith. And meanwhile, Paul also takes it to teach something. [01:14:07]
Firstly, helper doesn't mean lower by default. Secondly, men and women come from each other and both from God. So, both are needed and both are under the lordship of Jesus Christ. Can we agree that's what we've talked about so far? [01:14:26]
And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife, as Christ is the head of the church. He is the savior. Christ is of of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. [01:15:26]
In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body, but feeds and cares for it just as Christ cares for the church and we are members of his body. [01:16:28]
What did it say? It said submit to each other. And then it says, "And so in a marriage relationship, this is what that submission looks like." So, I got to tell you, I don't I don't know. I feel like guys got the bad end of the stick on this one. Both of you submit. [01:17:26]
Because as Jesus submits to the father, he's already like, "Well, it's my order, too. It's my choice, too." And what is the marriage relationship? It it's an example of us in the church, but understand as well that it is an image of God, two who become one. [01:20:52]
If the two of you operate as one and see each other as partners to go through life, any kind of hierarchy doesn't matter because you're partners and you're going in the same direction. I want you to picture or just look at the picture of a dance right now. [01:21:26]
Because it's a dance. It's cooperation. It is unity, equality, love, respect, mutual submission, and partnership. It is not something made up of one person being doineering. It's not one person putting someone down. It's two partners working together for great ends. [01:23:34]
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