Four Ways Scripture Defines Adultery and Repentance

Devotional

Day 1: God's Design for Marriage from the Beginning

Marriage is not a human invention but a divine institution established by God at creation. It is a sacred covenant where a man and a woman are joined together, becoming one flesh in a union that reflects God's own character. This bond is not merely a legal contract or a sentimental partnership; it is a profound spiritual reality created and defined by God Himself. Understanding this foundational truth is essential for grasping the seriousness of covenant faithfulness. [43:26]

“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that he who created them in the beginning made them male and female, and he also said, ‘For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Matthew 19:4–6, CSB)

Reflection: In what practical ways does your view of marriage align with, or differ from, this biblical definition of a one-flesh covenant? How might adjusting your perspective to match God's design change the way you approach your marriage or prepare for a future one?

Day 2: The Seriousness of Covenant-Breaking Sexual Sin

Sexual sin is a violent fracture of the one-flesh covenant, a tearing apart of what God has joined together. It is not a private matter but a fundamental betrayal of a sacred trust that damages individuals, families, and our witness to the gospel. This sin can take many forms, from a physical affair to the functional abandonment of a spouse through a secret life of pornography. The call is to see such actions through God's eyes—not as minor slips but as serious covenant violence. [46:42]

“I tell you, everyone who divorces his wife, except in a case of sexual immorality, and marries another commits adultery.” (Matthew 19:9, CSB)

Reflection: Where have you been tempted to minimize a pattern of sexual sin in your own life by comparing it to something "worse"? What would it look like to courageously call it what God calls it and begin taking steps toward repentance and accountability?

Day 3: Adultery of the Heart and the Call to Radical Obedience

Jesus expands the definition of adultery beyond the physical act to include the intentional cultivation of lust in the heart. This inward sin reduces a person made in God’s image to an object for personal consumption and betrays the covenant of marriage in the mind. The call to radical obedience—to gouge out an eye or cut off a hand—is a metaphor for doing whatever is necessary to remove the sources of temptation and protect one's purity and marriage. [54:14]

“But I tell you, everyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. If your right eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. For it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.” (Matthew 5:28–29, CSB)

Reflection: What is one specific "pathway" or habit that you know feeds lustful thoughts, and what is one concrete, even difficult, step you can take this week to "cut it off" from your life?

Day 4: Emotional Affairs and Covenant Treachery

Covenant allegiance can be violated not only with the body but also with the heart and emotions. An emotional affair occurs when the intimacy, attention, and loyalty that belong solely to a spouse are secretly transferred to another person. This slow displacement is described in Scripture as treachery—a profound betrayal of trust that occurs in the shadows of secrecy and misplaced affection. [01:00:59]

“And you ask, “Why?” Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have acted treacherously against her, though she was your marriage partner and your wife by covenant.” (Malachi 2:14, CSB)

Reflection: Are there any relationships in your life where you find yourself hiding messages, conversations, or meet-ups from your spouse? What would it look like to bring that relationship into the light and re-establish appropriate boundaries to protect your covenant?

Day 5: Grace for the Past and Fidelity for the Present

For those who carry the weight of a past divorce or remarriage, the gospel offers profound grace and clarity. While Jesus’ words on divorce are serious and should not be softened, they are meant to shatter self-righteousness, not drive the repentant to despair. A second marriage, once entered, is a real covenant that God expects to be honored with faithfulness and love, lived out under the covering of Christ’s cleansing work. [01:12:58]

“And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.” (1 Corinthians 6:11, CSB)

Reflection: If you have experienced divorce, how can you, from a place of being washed and justified by Christ, faithfully honor your current covenant while also offering grace and peace to those affected by your past?

Sermon Summary

Marriage is presented as God’s covenantal, one‑flesh union — a divine joining that no court or culture has authority to redefine. The created order anchors the discussion: marriage is public, moral, and spiritual, and God hates the tearing apart of what he has joined. Adultery appears in four biblical "lanes": (1) bodily covenant‑breaking sexual sin, where porneia (a broad term that includes adultery, fornication, incest, and homosexual practice) can fracture the marriage and sometimes justifies divorce as permission, not command; (2) adultery of the eyes and heart, where entertained lust and habitual pornography constitute inward betrayal; (3) adultery of covenant allegiance, where emotional affairs and secret affinities transfer marital intimacy outside the marriage; and (4) unlawful remarriage or the false‑reset, where divorce and subsequent marriage can be classified as adultery depending on the case law and biblical nuance.

Practical diagnosis and pastoral care are emphasized: honest self‑questioning, prudent confession, and careful pastoral accompaniment are required before disclosure; restoration demands verified change, safety for the betrayed spouse, and long‑term fidelity. For those ensnared by pornography or lust, radical amputation of access and route‑changing habits are urged alongside gospel‑shaped desire for Christ. Emotional infidelity calls for immediate transparency, cessation of secret channels, and redirected affection toward the spouse. On the most painful category — remarriage after divorce — the text leans toward a gnomic reading: the act of marrying a divorced person can be properly named adultery while recognizing the reality and binding nature of a new covenant; the Bible does not automatically demand dissolving the second marriage as the normal path of repentance.

Throughout, the gospel is central: adultery and divorce are not unforgivable. Christ’s cross cleanses and restores; repentance looks like brokenness over the past combined with absolute fidelity in the present. Practical steps (filters, accountability, pastoral plans, and where appropriate, protection for the vulnerable) are recommended as means that support repentance. The hope offered is that marriages become visible pictures of Christ’s faithful cleansing and keeping of his bride, and that individuals turn from sin to the renewing work of Christ by faith and obedience.

Key Takeaways

1. Marriage is God's one‑flesh covenant The created order binds spouses in a public, moral, and spiritual union that no human institution may rewrite. Recognizing marriage as God‑made changes how divorce and fidelity are judged: vows bind before God and neighbor. This understanding guards the heart against treating marriage as a disposable contract and orients repentance toward faithful repair. [43:52]
2. Covenant sexual sin is adultery Porneia is broad and violent to the one‑flesh bond: pornography, incest, and sexual immorality fracture covenant loyalty. A spouse who withholds intimacy through addictive sexual sin can be functionally absent — present in body but abandoned in covenant. Naming such behavior honestly enables pastoral care, accountability, and a repair plan rooted in verified change rather than mere promises. [46:19]
3. Lust is internal, real adultery Jesus locates adultery in the heart: entertained and chosen lust objectifies persons and trains desire away from covenant love. Temptation differs from sustained, cultivated fantasy that reduces another to a product; the remedy is radical amputation of pathways and vigorous formation of superior affections for Christ. Filters, accountability, and redirected hunger toward the Savior are practical disciplines that expose and rewire the heart. [51:47]
4. Remarriage is not simple reset The Bible treats some divorces and remarriages as unauthorized and classifies the act as adultery, yet it also recognizes the reality and binding force of a new covenant. Deuteronomy’s case law prevents treating marriage as a trial contract and signals that undoing a second covenant is not the normal path of repentance. Pastoral discernment, scriptural nuance (gnomic vs. durative readings), and care for children and present spouses shape a gospel response of fidelity and restitution where possible. [69:06]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[02:07] - Housekeeping & Visitor Info
[17:37] - Opening Prayer (Psalm 119)
[38:14] - Scripture & Teaching Setup
[40:12] - The Burning Question Introduced
[42:16] - Biblical Definition of Marriage
[45:26] - Adultery of the Body (Porneia)
[51:47] - Adultery of Eyes and Heart (Lust)
[55:01] - Practical Steps: Amputation & Filters
[58:56] - Adultery of Covenant Allegiance (Emotional Affairs)
[64:10] - Unlawful Remarriage and the False Reset
[76:22] - Gospel, Repentance, and Invitation
[81:11] - Altar Call & Baptism Invitation
[87:52] - Offering and Closing Announcements

Bible Study Guide

Bible reading
Matthew 19:3–9 (ESV)
*And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so."*

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Observation questions

What does Jesus point to as the original design and purpose of marriage?
According to Jesus, what is the foundational reason God hates divorce?
What exception does Jesus give regarding divorce, and what does the Greek word *porneia* include? [45:26]
How does Jesus expand the definition of adultery beyond physical acts in Matthew 5:27–28? [51:47]

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Interpretation questions

Why do you think Jesus goes back to Genesis when answering a question about divorce? What does this reveal about how we should approach marriage?
Jesus says looking with lust is committing adultery in the heart. How does this change our understanding of purity and faithfulness in marriage? [51:47]
In what ways can emotional attachment to someone outside of marriage be considered “covenant treachery”? [59:54]
How should a person who is remarried after an unbiblical divorce understand their current marriage in light of Jesus’ words? [01:09:06]

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Application questions

In what specific ways have you allowed culture to shape your view of marriage instead of God’s Word? What is one step you can take to align your thinking with Scripture?
Has your desire for your spouse been hollowed out because your mind is being trained by pornography or fantasy? [48:33] What would “radical amputation” look like in your life regarding media and entertainment?
Are there relationships in your life where you are sharing emotional intimacy that belongs to your spouse? What would it look like to redirect that affection and pursue transparency? [01:01:24]
If you are in a second marriage, how can you honor that covenant while still grieving past failures? What does gospel-shaped repentance look like in your current relationship? [01:15:11]
What practical steps—like filters, accountability, or changed routines—can you take this week to protect your heart and marriage from adultery in any form? [55:01]
How can your marriage better reflect Christ’s faithful love for the church? What’s one way you can pursue that this week?
If you’re single, how can you cultivate emotional and relational purity now to prepare for a covenant marriage later?

Sermon Clips

If you know anything about me and what I've been trying to teach you is that marriage preaches the gospel. Marriage matters because it reflects Christ and the church. When we treat our vows lightly, we are implicitly preaching a gospel of abandonment by God. But when we repent and remain faithful, we're showing the world the true gospel. Christ does not abandon his church. He cleanses her, restores her, and keeps her his as his own. [01:15:58] (32 seconds) #MarriagePreachesGospel

Repentance here. Here's what I want you to mean. Repentance does not mean dissolving your current marriage as some penance for the past. It means brokenness over what has happened, but absolute fidelity in the present. Where possible, pursue peace and restitution. Honestly, own up to any past sin and speak with humility towards your former spouse and care for your children. And then dedicate your marriage to the Lord. Mourn the death of your first covenant but thank God for the grace in the new one. [01:15:11] (36 seconds) #RepentanceAndFidelity

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Four Ways Scripture Defines Adultery and Repentance

Devotional

Day 1: God's Design for Marriage from the Beginning

Day 2: The Seriousness of Covenant-Breaking Sexual Sin

Day 3: Adultery of the Heart and the Call to Radical Obedience

Day 4: Emotional Affairs and Covenant Treachery

Day 5: Grace for the Past and Fidelity for the Present

Sermon Summary

Key Takeaways

Youtube Chapters

Bible Study Guide

Sermon Clips

Chatbot

Four Ways Scripture Defines Adultery and Repentance

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