Belonging Before Believing: Love One Another Like Jesus

Jul 12, 2026

Devotional

Day 1: The Uncomfortable Question in the Sycamore Tree’s Shadow

A quiet tension lives between loving a church and hesitating to invite others into it. Like Zacchaeus perched in his tree, many feel both drawn to Jesus and uncertain about bringing others near. This gap reveals hidden fears about belonging, worthiness, or whether our communities truly reflect Christ’s radical welcome. Jesus didn’t wait for Zacchaeus to clean up his life before calling him down. His love moved first, creating space for transformation. What unspoken assumptions keep us from extending that same disruptive invitation? [30:26]

“Jesus entered Jericho and made his way through the town. There was a man there named Zacchaeus… Jesus looked up and said, ‘Zacchaeus, come down immediately. I must stay at your house today.’” (Luke 19:1–5, NLT)

Reflection: What specific fear or assumption rises in you when you consider inviting a friend to church? How might Jesus’ immediate welcome of Zacchaeus challenge that hesitation?

Day 2: Dirty Feet and Reluctant Surrender

Peter recoiled when Jesus knelt to wash his feet, mistaking service for shame. His resistance mirrors our struggle to receive love before giving it. True discipleship begins not in our acts of sacrifice but in letting Christ serve us in our mess. Until we accept being loved undeservedly, our giving risks becoming transactional. Jesus’ basin and towel dismantle the myth that worthiness precedes belonging. [42:24]

“Peter declared, ‘You will never wash my feet!’ Jesus replied, ‘Unless I wash you, you won’t belong to me.’” (John 13:8, NLT)

Reflection: Where do you instinctively resist care from others? How might accepting help this week prepare you to love more freely?

Day 3: When Warmth Becomes a Closed Circle

A church can radiate genuine fellowship yet remain invisible to outsiders. Like gravitational pull, philia love naturally draws inward toward shared experiences and comforts. But agape love bends downward, crossing barriers to those who cannot reciprocate. Jesus washed Judas’ feet knowing betrayal was imminent. His love refused the safety of insiders. [47:17]

“If you love only those who love you, what reward is there in that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much.” (Matthew 5:46, NLT)

Reflection: When have you prioritized comfort over crossing a relational barrier? What small step could open your circle this week?

Day 4: The Basin and Towel Before the Verdict

Jesus gave his new command in a room full of impending failure. Judas would betray. Peter would deny. Yet love was mandated not as a feeling but as a defiant act. The world judges discipleship not by our theology but by whether our love survives disappointment. True agape costs nothing less than everything. [48:14]

“Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” (John 13:35, NLT)

Reflection: Where have you substituted niceness for costly love? What relationship needs truth spoken gently this week?

Day 5: A Name, a Face, and the Edge of the Circle

The face that surfaces when asked “Would you bring them?” reveals our next frontier. For Jesus, it was a tax collector in a tree. For us, it might be the colleague eating alone or the neighbor who believes they’re unwelcome. Love becomes tangible when we move from general kindness to specific invitation. [57:30]

“Go out into the country lanes and behind the hedges and urge anyone you find to come, so that the house will be full.” (Luke 14:23, NLT)

Reflection: Whose face immediately comes to mind as someone you’ve hesitated to invite? What one intentional step could you take toward them before Sunday?

Sermon Summary

The question lands plainly: would Kingsford Church bring friends here, and if not, why not? That gap between “I love this church” and “I would not bring them here” exposes something deeper than preference. The reluctance may say something about the church, or about closed circles, or about loneliness, or about the courage it takes to invite someone close.

Jesus never had this problem. Jesus walked into Jericho, looked up into a tree, called Zacchaeus by name, and brought belonging before believing. The people the religious crowd could not stand were the very people who could not stay away from Jesus. Tax collectors, sinners, the sick, the unclean, and those far from home felt safe enough to come close.

John 13 brings that love into the room on the last night of Jesus’ life. Jesus takes the highest place by taking the lowest place, wrapping a towel around his waist and washing dirty feet. Peter recoils, but Jesus tells him, “unless I wash you, you have no part with me.” Before Peter can serve, Peter has to be served. Before Peter can love like this, Peter has to be loved like this.

Judas walks out, and John writes, “and it was night.” The command to love is given in the room where love is about to collapse. Judas will betray. Peter will deny. Jesus still says, “love each other just as I have loved you.”

The new command is not love as self-improvement. The old command had a ceiling: love your neighbor as yourself. Jesus raises the ceiling: love just as he has loved. That love is agape, not merely philia. Philia is real friendship and warmth, and Kingsford Church has a great deal of it. But philia has a gravity that pulls inward, while agape goes down, crosses over, and moves toward the person who cannot pay it back.

A church can be warm and closed at the same time. Nice keeps everyone comfortable, but agape speaks the truth in love. Jesus was safe for sinners and dangerous to the self-righteous. The church’s role is not to make the gospel nice, but to become safe enough to carry the gospel.

The call is simple and costly: tell the truth before God, let oneself be loved, open the circle, and ask God for one name. Love one another must be real inside the church, not a show for visitors. Then that warmth can turn outward, so the person standing on the edge can finally feel it.

Key Takeaways

1. Belonging comes before believing. [39:42] Jesus’ love does not wait for people to become clean, useful, or convinced. Zacchaeus receives table fellowship before his life changes, and that welcome becomes the place where repentance can breathe. The church that carries Jesus’ love gives people room to come close before demanding that they know how to belong. [39:42]
2. Warm circles can still close. [47:17] Philia love can be good, deep, and real, yet still point all its warmth inward. A community may feel like home to insiders while remaining invisible or unreachable to the person standing at the edge. Agape love notices that edge and deliberately crosses it. [47:17]
3. Agape is braver than niceness. [49:31] Niceness often avoids the true thing because comfort feels safer than courage. Agape can speak because it does not need control, approval, or repayment from the other person. Jesus’ love is safe enough for sinners to come near and bold enough to tell Peter the truth. [49:31]
4. Receiving love is spiritual work. [56:19] Peter cannot wash feet until Jesus first washes his. Self-sufficiency can look strong, but it may quietly refuse the very grace that forms a disciple. Letting another person love, help, host, or know the need can become an act of surrender to Christ. [56:19]
5. One name opens the circle. [01:00:21] Agape often begins with one face, not a grand plan. The student eating alone, the colleague without Christ, or the friend who has never been invited may be the place where obedience starts. A coffee, a lift, a real conversation, or a seat beside someone can become the small doorway through which Jesus’ love is seen.

## [60:21]

Youtube Chapters

[00:00] - Welcome
[28:04] - A Convicting Question
[31:03] - Jesus Never Had This Problem
[33:07] - Why Church Can Feel Unsafe
[36:12] - Formation Into Love
[39:42] - John 13 And The New Command
[41:21] - The Basin, Towel, And Judas
[43:19] - A New Kind Of Love
[45:05] - Philia, Agape, And Closed Warmth
[47:54] - The Watching World Gives The Verdict
[49:31] - Truth In Love, Not Niceness
[53:01] - Far From Home, Loved First
[58:31] - Four Steps To Open The Circle
[60:57] - Love One Another As A Community
[64:32] - Belonging Before Believing

Bible Study Guide

Bible Reading
John 13:34-35 (NLT)
“So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”

Observation Questions

In John 13, Jesus washes His disciples’ feet, including Judas’. What specific actions and attitudes does this act reveal about His love?
How does Jesus redefine the standard of love in John 13:34 compared to the Old Testament command to “love your neighbor as yourself”?
What contrast does the sermon highlight between philia (friendship love) and agape (selfless love)? [45:05]

Interpretation Questions

Why might Peter’s refusal to let Jesus wash his feet (John 13:8) reflect a deeper struggle with receiving grace? How does this relate to the idea that “receiving love is spiritual work”? [56:19]
Jesus commands love even as Judas prepares to betray Him. What does this teach about the relationship between love and vulnerability?
The sermon states, “A church can be warm and closed at the same time.” How does philia love’s inward gravity create this tension? [47:17]

Application Questions

“Belonging comes before believing” means creating space for people to belong before they share our beliefs. Who in your life needs to experience belonging first? What is one practical way to invite them into your circle this week? [39:42]
Reflect on a time when you avoided speaking the truth to protect comfort or a relationship. How could agape love have changed your response? [49:31]
The sermon challenges, “Let yourself be loved.” Where are you resisting help, hospitality, or vulnerability? What step could you take to receive love from others? [56:19]
“Ask God for one name” to invite into community. Who comes to mind? What small action (coffee, a conversation, a seat beside you) could open a doorway for them? [01:00:21]
How might your friendships or routines unintentionally create a “closed circle”? What habit could you adopt to turn warmth outward toward someone on the edge?

Sermon Clips

83s

#AgapeSafeAndBold

“``Nice is not what Jesus what Jesus was because Jesus was safe for sinners, but he was dangerous to the self righteous. When Peter refused to have his feet washed, Jesus did not soothe him. He told him the truth, and it really hurt. It stung. And yet Zacchaeus from last week was welcomed. And though he welcomed Jesus, it cost him half of his wealth. Jesus was warm, and he was bold. And I don't think he was just merely nice. Nothing that I could read in the gospels just shows him as just to be merely nice. And so agape love is both safe and courageous. Safe enough that you will not be despised or written off here, but bold enough to actually pursue you, to stay when it is inconvenient, to have the real conversation and not just be polite. Our job, our role is not to make the gospel nice. Our job is to make ourselves safe enough to carry the gospel message.”

43s

#LovedFirst

“Because agape love can't be manufactured. Right? You do not become a loving person by gritting your teeth and trying harder. Agape comes from one place and one place only, from having been loved like that first, from having been loved by Jesus. Right? Jesus says, just as I have loved you. And so his love comes first, and ours is the overflow of the love of Jesus in our lives. You were once far from home, but your feet got washed before you even deserved it.”

62s

#AgapeCrossesBoundaries

“But here's the warning for us. The warning is this. This type of love, this filia type of love has a gravity, and that gravity always pulls inwards, always pulls towards who are inside. Right? It binds you to your own. But the words on Jesus' lips that night, that kind of love was not filia kind of love. It's the the love in called agape. Agape love. And we know what it meant by it because he had just shown them. Right? It does not stay among equals. It goes down. It crosses over. It moves towards the people who are not like you and cannot pay you back. It is Jesus on the floor washing the feet of the man who is about to sell him out.”

62s

#WarmButClosed

“And a church can be full of filia and short on agape love. You can be genuinely warm and have all the warmth pointed inwards. It's warm to us. It's comfortable. It's nice. But it's also invisible to the person at the edge who does not yet belong to that community. And here's a hard line for me to say, that you can be a warm church and a closed church at the same time. Then verse 35, Jesus says this. It's a sentence that changes everything. He says this, your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciple.”

58s

#LetYourselfBeLoved

“I'm I'm a work in progress, guys, and so are you. Every one of us in this room and online is made in the image of God, marred by sin, and made whole in Jesus. And that work is not finished in any one of us. It is the Holy Spirit still changing us, still heal healing us, still moving us towards Jesus. And a church that only knows how to give and not receive is not showing the fullness of life in Christ. Jesus said to Peter, unless I wash you, you have no part with me. And so sometimes the most spiritual thing that any of us could ever do is just to let yourself be loved.”

69s

#LoveLikeJesus

“And so Jesus is not canceling the command to love. What he's doing is he's actually fulfilling it, and he's lifting it into something that no one had ever seen before. Because I wanna tell you that the old command had a ceiling, and the ceiling was you. You kept it. I say that because the passage or that verse says, to love them as you love yourself. Right? That's what Duncan said in his prayer. But Jesus raises it, and he says, I want you to love just as I have loved you. Right? Remember that it's Jesus here that there is the basin, there is a towel, there is the kneeling on the floor to wash people's feet, which means that this love is not a self improvement kind of love. It's a different love together. It's his love. It's his transformation for us.”

70s

#SpeakTruthInLove

“Right? Paul gives this phrase, speak the truth in love. And here's what we're really good at. We're really good at just understanding or believing or or remembering half of it. Some of us say the hard thing, and we call that love. And yet the other person walks away bleeding. Many of us, and I'll say many of us, say nothing at all and call our silence kindness. But silence is not protecting them from what I'm starting to learn about myself. Silence is about protecting ourselves or myself from a conversation that that we don't wanna have. And notice what keeps us quiet. Right? It is philia. The bond is precious, and perhaps we don't wanna risk it. But agape love can afford to speak, can afford to say the the hard thing in love because agape does not need anything back.”

62s

#FormedForLove

“And a closed circle is a formation problem, not a personality one. I said last week that the goal of this series is not information. It's about formation. I use the word mimeites. It's a Greek word to mimic or to know, where we get the word mime. Right? That the the example from the bible is that it is someone who is is a disciple who walks so close to their rabbi that they are covered in the dust of their rabbi. Close enough that you could tell whose they were just by watching them. They were just close enough to be formed. But this question this week is this, what are we formed for? And Jesus answers it with one word. He answers with the word love.”

Ask a question about this sermon

Kingsford Church of Christ This sermon · AI assistant

Why might Christians hesitate to invite friends?

How does Jesus redefine love for disciples?

What distinguishes agape from philia in practice?

Belonging Before Believing: Love One Another Like Jesus

Devotional

Day 1: The Uncomfortable Question in the Sycamore Tree’s Shadow

Day 2: Dirty Feet and Reluctant Surrender

Day 3: When Warmth Becomes a Closed Circle

Day 4: The Basin and Towel Before the Verdict

Day 5: A Name, a Face, and the Edge of the Circle

Sermon Summary

Key Takeaways

Youtube Chapters

Bible Study Guide

Sermon Clips

Belonging Before Believing: Love One Another Like Jesus

Share