Three Ingredients for Relationships that Go the Distance | Part 3 | Andy Stanley

And in the love chapter, listen to what he said two thousand years ago. Two thousand years ago, there were no file drawers, but there were score keepers. He said, love, this is fascinating, love, it keeps no records. Love, it keeps no records of wrongs or one translation says, it keeps no record of wrongs done. Love doesn't keep score and here's why. Because where there's a score, the implication is there's a competition. There's a winner and there's a loser. Know, rhetorical question but you probably know the answer, what's the win in a relationship? It's the relationship. [00:16:26] (44 seconds)  #LoveKeepsNoScore

As Jesus' followers, because the basis of all this is different than the average person or the way that we were brought up or what our intuition tells us to do. As Jesus followers, the honor we're talking about, showing honor, honor isn't contingent upon the behavior of the person receiving the honor. It's contingent upon the person showing or expressing the honor, which is us. If this wasn't the case, otherwise Paul couldn't command it. He he couldn't command it. If if it was contingent upon the person being honorable, he would have said this, he would have written this, honor the honorable, which is what we all do, which is what most people do. [00:28:45] (42 seconds)  #HonorIsOurChoice

Paul is writing this to people, he doesn't know who's gonna read it. He certainly he certainly didn't know two thousand years later we were gonna be reading it. But he's saying, no, the basis of the honor you're demonstrating isn't the recipient. The basis of the honor you're expressing is the giver or the one showing honor based on how they have been honored, how we have been honored by our heavenly father. And so he says, this is what you do, you honor one another above yourself. Practically speaking, treat one another honorably, and don't treat one another dishonorably. [00:29:27] (44 seconds)  #HonorAboveSelf

To honor one another. To defer, to show respect regardless based on the fact that what God has done for us, not to earn something from God, this is important, not to earn something from God, but in response to what God has already given us freely, He gave us Himself. So here's wrap up question. I was tempted to say, so which one of these three do you think you need to work on? And we'd all be, no, no, no, But that's an easy question. I wanna ask a harder question. Okay? Of the three, which one do you imagine the people closest to you wish you would work on? [00:35:01] (39 seconds)  #HonorFromGrace

And what does that do for the relationship? Nothing good because you have a third party. In healthy relationships, they don't keep score because there's no score to keep. Now here's a fascinating fact. This is why I know I say it all the time, you should read the Bible, but gosh, you should so read the New Testament, the words of Jesus and those that followed after Jesus. Two this is amazing. Two thousand years ago, Two thousand years ago, the Apostle Paul writes a letter to Christians living in Corinth, and the thirteenth chapter, of course they didn't have chapters and verses, he didn't you don't write like that, but later they were put in there so we could find stuff, right? So first Corinthians 13 sometimes is called the love chapter, in fact some of you had it or part of it read at your wedding. [00:15:42] (44 seconds)  #LoveWithoutRecords

Here's what he says there. This is so powerful and a little bit of a throwback from to week one. He says, Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, Rather, in humility, here's the same word again, it's a financial term, value others above yourselves. Consider them more valuable than you. Not because they are, they aren't. In fact, James says, you know, there's not value in people. People are all equally valuable to God, made in the image of God. Paul says that, Jesus modeled that. But here's what they're getting at. They all say this, that we are to treat other people as if they were in fact more valuable than us. Why? You ready for this? [00:20:57] (44 seconds)  #HumilityOverAmbition

Christianity, just read the New Testament, Christianity is as horizontal as it is vertical on earth as it is in heaven. That if Jesus was clear about anything, it was this, that our love for God that our love for God is authenticated, not by church attendance, our our love for God isn't authenticated by our prayers. Our love for God is authenticated by our love for others on earth as it is in heaven. Anyway, so back to the series. So these three ingredients, [00:09:37] (39 seconds)  #LoveGodLovePeople