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``now grief should never have the last word and we know it won't if we're in Christ we know it won't but right now in this moment maybe what you need to hear the most is it's okay it's okay to grieve and we've all gone through moments that we had never would have chosen to go through but if we look back those are the moments that impacted our lives and changed our lives the most and no we wouldn't say yeah I would want to go through that moment again but yet those moments became doorways not because the pain was good but because something opened up within us